Hey, Guess What? I Cried.

I decided one way or another, I was going to make Ben talk to me. So he did. And I've never felt so hurt in my entire life. He said he didn't like me for who I was deep down inside. And I...I couldn't take it anymore. I just burst out crying and logged off. I sat on the bathroom floor and cried for about 20 minutes.
Apparently, my rl best friend Katie-Ana heard me. Don't ask, it's complicated. So she got online, and since she's mutual friends with Ben, took the liberty of yelling at him. She got all up in his face, told him I loved him and he was my entire world, etc etc. And then she said if he ever made me cry again, he'd regret it.
Then he broke down and confessed all this shit he's going through with his best friend Sarah and how for 3 years she's been in love with him and she knows he's gay and she says his hugs are the only thing that make her happy yadda yadda, pressuring him into feeling bad. He says people always think they're going out and that's the way she likes it. So, he finally gets out of that and then as soon as he gets home, I'm like all chatty and he feels like it's the exact same thing all over again like deja vu of the worst kind. So he snaps at me and ditches me and I end up feeling really bad.
So anyway, Kat relayed it all to me, and then Ben said he was really sorry and he shouldn't act that way to me when I didn't even know why.
And I stopped crying.
I promised him we'd just be friends. That's gonna be the hardest thing ever. But I'm honestly going to try. As long as I talk to him, I'm happy. I don't care if we're just friends. So, things are good between us.
I love him again. I love Kat. Kat loves Ben again because I told her to. Inside she was looking forward to ripping his arms out and beating him to death with them.
But I'm so happy the drama's all over. Now we can just talk about stupid things and laugh like we used to. And fight over whether Patrick Dempsey or James Marsden is hotter. (James Marsden ftw)

Ben doesn't read this blog, because I'd probably die if he ever found it, but anyway, I love you as my best friend and I'm sorry, and I'm glad we fixed it. <3 Now we can move past it again. (: